Karzz: Ek Chudail Thi Aur Ek Buffoon Tha  

Posted by Vee

There I go with my take on Karzz. The review which you see below is not exactly the same which I wrote for PFC here. I wrote the below piece and sent to PFC which was sent back to me stating I need to modify it as this looked more like an attack on Himesh than a balanced review. So, I modified it a bit which got published here.
Btw, if the below one doesn't look a balanced one then read it as my take on HIMESH and other buffoons who raped and pulverized the orignial Karz; a classic.

It is futile to analyze and dissect Karzz as it’s undisputed that when it comes to Himesh everything he does sucks including judging those mindless talent shows wherein all he does is ‘give roti’ to anyone who remotely howls and hams like him. His music to an extent was good till he assailed us with his much-known nasal crooning. Aashiq Banaya, Aashiq Banaya was bearable which was accepted as there was a new fresh voice in the market. He should have stopped there and then and made HISTORY; the word with which he is obsessed these days. Watch him in the current season of ‘Sa Re Ga Ma’ and you will know what I mean.

Anyways so he should have just stopped singing after that chartbuster and concentrated more on composing. But that was not the case. Sar pe chaddh ke baith gaya and bombarded us with his howls one after the other. We ignored. How could he put up with that and gave age-old cliché ‘love me or hate me, can’t ignore me’ a forceful win by deciding to act. We gave up. The guy is suffering of psychosis we convinced ourselves with as we saw him getting fused with the famous trio already suffering with that: Ekta Kapoor, Karan Johar and Rakhi Sawant.

After showcasing his shaved bare-chest in autobiographical Aap Ka Suroor, he goes a step further in Karzz and does a whole makeover by getting hair silkier, lips fuller and legs much slimmer than both the heroines while figure (not physique) somewhere in between the lasses. There is stiff competition amongst the trio as who got the better shade of lipstick.

I do not know whose idea was it to cast Himesh as Monty (a role made iconic by Rishi). Whoever it is but this could be the worst case reported of casting; even worst than AB as Gabbar. Rishi was an icon, heart-throb of million girls who had bitches named Neetu which were kicked daily. He made nation dance to his ‘Om Shanti Om’ and ‘Ek Haseena Thi’ and later now is pulverized beyond mend by Himesh. Even DJ Suketu’s remix sounds thousand times better. He confessed before the release that “Rishi is the best-looking Monty and I am the worst.” Oh yes, you buffoon. What took you so long to realize?

Satish Kaushik (Director) agrees that no one can match Rishi’s performance. So much confidence in the beginning it self. Whoa!!! Satish adds, “I can judge between good, bad and amateur performances and I have to admit, he has surprised me with his performance.” Alright Tere Naam was fluke. That’s all I can construe from this statement of yours Satish Ji.

And surprised were we to know Himesh as Monty. As if that was not enough, you have Urmila as Kamini. Simi got nominated for her role. I doubt if Urmila would be. No, I am sure. She won’t be.She looks frail and malnourished. That ghastly blood-soaked red lipstick gave Chudail-on-run feel to her wicked act. Chudail also goes onto give some hip-shaking moments with the buffoon. Falooda Nights.

Shweta Kumar is easily forgettable. She has nothing to do. I won’t add apart from this or that. She is nonentity. Her act doesn’t add to the story. And you wonder how that could be? In original, Tina Munim did carry the story forward and she is noticeable unlike Shweta. Watch out for few classic moments like once when she is singing Monty’s famous song and forgets the lines and soon you see Monty completing the lines. Classic? Because he is on a helicopter and she is on earth. How the hell he heard her singing and forgetting the lyrics? Mashallah.

I have been lately been intrigued by what not-so-nice-and-gentlemanly words are called and pronounced in various languages and have learnt quite a lot of them and today I want to hurl all those freaking-so-awful-they-are-actually-splendid-to-hear words on every one associated with the movie called Karzz, Ghai-Kaushik-T-Series-The Buffoon-and-The Chudail. As I exchanged SMSes late in the night with some one connected in the making of this film and has seen it, I informed him that I am going to catch Karzz first day first show. He replied, “Haha, All The Best.” Wow!!! That was comforting.

Something which I read somewhere today: ”Karzzzz belongs to a guy who has supreme confidence in his capabilities, and for the fans who agree. For the rest, there is always something on TV. Himesh is sure to stay.”

Alright, time for us to relocate to Somalia guys.

This entry was posted on Sunday, October 19, 2008 and is filed under . You can leave a response and follow any responses to this entry through the Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom) .

32 Pointless but Viscous Comments.

The original Karz is one of favorite movies and one of those which I have seen many times. And here goes Himesh, one of the celebrities I despise the most and tries to be Monty!!! Grrr $#@%!##@*& I simply can't stand his voice or his looks.

@ Oxy.
In case you didn't know (though I think you did) there are 4 Zs. Look closely at the posters (if you dare) and you'll see them. Apparently Himess was told that the movie will flop if it didn't have 4 Zs.

There is stiff competition amongst the trio as who got the better shade of lipstick
Priceless!

LOL.this is funnier than ur PFC post!! and how dare u miss the z's ???? and a dig at Rakhi Sawant??? I dont understand you Oxy Boy :P

Reema: Mine too. Why special characters.. For him use the language freely and openly ..

Jhayu: Well I knew but I keep seeing the diff counts of 'z' everywhere.. kahin 2, kahin 3, kahin 10.. (I saw in the trailers on TV and it was 2)..but 4 it is if u say so..

Was he really told that?

Thanks and yes that frame where the trio appear together is priceless too..:)

Vimmuuu: Thanks boy. Sorry boss I guess I was Zzzzing myself when I wrote so missed. :)

Well, mera aur rakhi ka rishta koi nahi samjhega. :)

ROFL ..
awesome review ..
he he ,.,..
This review is funnier than watching his movie ..
seriously ,this man should stop singing ..
He did justice to his music in the movie dasavatharam by not singing any songs . :D

Arvind: Man, we cannot stop him.. No matter what!!! and anyways jab tak aise log hain hamara entertainment hota rehta hai.. so let him howl and ham..

//heart-throb of million girls who had bitches named Neetu which were kicked daily. //
really??

i am not going to watch this shitty movie...i don't watch hindi movies at all these days.

BTW: saw "BOY A" the other day.Worth a dekho bro.

V: Haha, well I have heard that from Mom that Girls were crazy about Rishi and they used to do that. And so was the case with Rajesh Khanna. Girls kept bitches named them Dimple and kicked.

No boy, I haven't seen Boy A. Have heard about it. It's based on some novel I guess.

Dude lovely writing ... they seems to be more entertaining than the movies bollywood is churning out :)

Vishwam: Thanks Buddy!!!

oh! so bad, eh? First off, pray tell me, why you wnt to watch this flick? :P

WHY DO WE NEED TO SHIFT TO SOMALIA????


Send your dearest Himmesh there...we all will be better off ;)

Excellent review buddy

WIAN: Such movies call me and I like a bhoot in a ramsay movie kheecha chala jaata hun.. :)

Smita: Alright, then you stay and suffer cuz he won't budge from here. Suna nahi kya ki there are so many who like him and moreover Satish Kaushik is now coming up with a movie on 'Taansen' and he wants Himesh to play the lead. Do I need to say more?

You have been tagged :
http://vimalsparadise.blogspot.com/2008/10/clicked.html

You can become a movie critic easily. Why don't you think about it as an alternate profession. Superb review.

Varun: Thanks.. Yes, I am trying.

OXY you are the best...

kaise in bichaaron ki pant utaar deta hai....im actually feeling bad for himes bhai...

but i totally agree with you. his makeover has been a complete disaster...and to think that yes...i too liked him at one time...

how come you write film reviews OXY...?

Preeti: How come means? I enjoy writing film reviews..

really...?

do you do it on a regular basis...?
do you get paid for it...?
do you write in newspapers...?
is it what you do full time...?

Dudezzz,

great throw at Himeshya...(i overheard some marathi manoos taking his name in this way..)

yeah, even i felt this was more a himesh-bashing write up than a movie review... all other departments of the movie were not mentioned enough..!!

but still, i enjoyed it wholly...!!

Vinzzzzzz....

;)

Preeti: Yes, Yes, Sometimes, Sometimes, No (but would love to)

Vinzzzzzzz :) Thankzzzzzz man, Yes and that is why PFC asked me to modify it which I did and posted there. Did ya read that version?

:-)

OXY tu kitna sweet hai re...

Hmmm, haan kya???? kaise...:):)

This year there is going to be a 'worst movie' award and the competition is already tough.

Own up ! You went to see karzzz so you could write about it on PFC.. maan jao..

Hahahahahahaha - Kaise matlab?

:-PPPP

Ava:Himesh ke naye baalo ki kasam maine first day ka plan pehle hi bana rakha tha... uske gaane ki bhi kasam le leta hun.. sach me..

Preeti:matlab hum sweet kaise? baaton se sweet...u meant? hahaha

Haan...

:-PPPPPPP

hahahahahahaa

Good one.

And I agree with Smita - why shift most of us to Somalia? Simpler to send Himessssbhai there....

Cheers,

Quirky Indian
http://quirkyindian.wordpress.com

Quirky: Try shifting him and then you will come to know that there are many gazillion fans of him who would not let him go.. so better we re-locate.. hahaha

Welcome to my Space

Himesh Reshammiyya is one word which can make even Gabbar Singh of Sholay go pale and looking for ear-plugs and blinds... :P
i wish someone makes him ugly... yeah, uglier than he is now :D

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